Sunday, October 11, 2009

A Beginner's Guide To MICA

May is that time of the year where kids pack their bags and head dreamy eyed to the coolest management school in the country. You know there ain't none cooler, none awesomer(!) and nowhere else do you learn to manage people and resources all the while having more fun than filling up your gut with a gallon of banana milk shake and strapping yourself onto a 200 MPH roller coaster ride or getting kicked off a cliff only to be caught in the end by a camouflaged bean bag!

All right all right, enough with all the selling. Point is, MICA is so cool that people sometimes scream out loud in the open or call security requesting them to turn down the air conditioner, not realizing they're out in the open! With so much to do and so little time to do it in, it would do people good to acquaint themselves with the most commonly used gyaan fundas and/or terminologies of what we refer to as the MICingo(i.e, MICA lingos!!).

1)FAFF: Stuck with a problem you don't have an answer to? Have to make a presentation only to realize you've whiled away the good part of your assignment time at the badminton court? Confronted with a question rudely woken up from deep slumber in class? How do you manage to sound intelligent and deeply analytical whilst all that could come out of that mouth of yours be Grade-A,1 year replacement warranty, solid gold bull mound? That's right folks. At MICA, we call this insanely amazing quality of MICANs to be able to get their backsides out of trouble or sound seemingly brilliant in scenarios they never would've thought they would find them in-FAFF!

MICA not only teaches branding and communications besides all the other killer stuff it hones but unofficially breeds FAFF talent by exposing candidates to real life situations where in the only way to survive or come out tops would be to FAFF the hell out of their wits! There's no official course on FAFF but believe-you-us(!),at the end of two years,120 of INDIAs best FAFFers are manufactured badge number et al! Also, somehow most people feel there's a silent 'P' to FAFF but no there isn't. It's a coin patented by MICANs!

2)CHOTA:All right now, big day, loads of classes, lots of reading and even more presentations. You're tired, half-dead, sleep deprived and so hungry that given a chance you wouldn't think twice before chewing an arm off the friend accompanying you out of class. Where do you go amidst all this turmoil? Where does a man/woman (political correctness is quintessential to survive at MICA!) head off to attain Nirvana while the world around him/her is collapsing? No points for guessing. You scram (most cases after 8 hours of witnessing and delivering presentations, barely crawl) to Chota with a single 't'!! Chota is where you get the famous 'Nimbu Paani' where most people gulp down half a dozen glasses oblivious to the peacocks and the wild cats in the background fighting for territory, order an omelette or a chicken chilly fry and crawl back to rest their troubled back sides on the very famous tyre barely managing to stay alive off the Chota tree! All this on credit of course! One of the many million perks of being at MICA!!

3)ROXY: Disney's got Mickey mouse, Kellogg’s got Tony the tiger and McDonald's got Ronald McDonald. Well, ever heard of a business school having its own life size living legend for a mascot? Well, MICA does!!Roxy, the inimitable German shepherd has carried MICA's image of charm, guile, intellect and instinctive brilliance on his shoulders as the official mascot for more than a decade and running. He lives life king size and his spirit keeps every MICAN going in the most turbulent of situations.

4)PARAS BHAI: MICA is secluded from civilization. Well, ok before you freak out, about 20 kms from civilization. That's speaking only in Ahmedabad. Students come from all over India with a suitcase or two and live on campus for months at a stretch. One person single-handedly takes care of every MICANs laundry needs from washing to ironing to delivery as well as keeping accounts of each dorm and room. Does he have an MBA? No!!Is he a kick-butt manager? Hell yeah! Paras Bhai is the one of the most famous personalities on campus away from the classroom. He works incessantly 7 days a week, all the while never losing the million watt smile on his face. That's MICA folks. The enthusiasm is contagious!

5)PAT: Is the abbreviated form of Prof.Atul Tandon, the face of MICA for more years than people can keep count of. His oratory prowess has touched scores of hearts and is loved by everyone on and off campus. A life size role model in public speaking and personality development, PAT, as he is fondly called, will make you fall in love with management and thus the MICAN way of managing skills, people and resources. Why do you think MICANs are fanatic alumnus year after year? We don't know...You tell us! ;)

6)Polly juice:Ahem..Ahem..some things are best left unexplained :)

7)Academic rigor: A term you'll hear quite frequently but won't know what to make of it till you graduate. Don't worry. We've quit speculating too!

8)CHA CHA: Be it the former director or the Dean of Academic affairs, everyone on campus(most of the feasible ones!) have a nick name fondly assigned to each by students and alumnus! Prof. Chatterjee is one of the best there is in the business of teaching Strategic Marketing Communications and Brand building. To top it all, he's also the Dean of Academics at MICA. But everyone's a professor in class (or in some cases, exams and presentation!). Outside, we all refer to the man fondly as CHA CHA. That's Prof. Chandan Chatterjee, ladies and gentlemen. MICA only has more surprises to offer. Oh, pleasant ones we mean! You might now stop wondering who to thank for item no.(7)!!

9)Prof. MATHEW: Ever thought Social Sciences or Indian culture and heritage and the politics of the world could actually be fascinating to hear and talk about for hours at end? We certainly didn’t. That was until a 6'4'' man in Jeans and shirt stormed into our world like a hurricane, as he did of alumnus years at a stretch, showed us movies in languages we thought didn't exist, touched our souls right up to our small intestines, ripped our understanding of the world to smithereens and gave everybody a glimpse of how it is out there and why it is so. Knowledge of unparalleled proportions, oratory beyond the realms of mortal understanding (yeah he's very human too!), Prof. Mathew is nothing short of a rock star in class. And he uses slides instead of a guitar! Next time you're wondering of the politics behind a bomb going off in rural Meghalaya or why Hugo Chavez's convoy took a different route to parliament, you know whom to contact!

10)Terminations: MICAs a big big close knit family. Everybody stays together, studies (ahem..ahem!) together and parties together. Sometimes, we forget to log off after working(again ahem..ahem!).And our dearest friends take over our closely guarder laptops and write nice little things about the poor, unfortunate wandering soul and 'CC' a copy off to all the students on Campus. This is then followed up by a single letter word titled 'terminated' by the poor soul when he/she discovers what's just happened to him behind his back, while all he dared to do was take a private moment by himself in the loo! Oh, and terminations are sometimes the best way to discover in-house gossip! You don't want to miss this one!

All rightie then, that's about it. Cram up this list and learn it by-heart, chant it every night before sleeping and after brushing your teeth every morning. NO amount of preparation for CAT or MICAT will get your brains tuned to the MICAN way of living more than this comprehensive list.

Trust us...at MICA...., we’ll show you the good life!

-Vasant Iyer

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